The tomato and the captain of the ship

May I have everyone’s attention please? We looked at each other, as the captain of the tiny little ship paused for a second and then carried on saying, that we had to stop at the next island. At least for tonight, he said. Maybe longer it depends on the weather. It was no longer safe for us to carry on due to the storm. As much as we wanted to follow our original plan, we had no choice than to accept his decision. After all he knew the waters. He knew the danger – after all he was the captain of the ship.

Yesterday I looked for signs. Answers. No number 11, 118 or 811. What was going on? Had I not been seeing these numbers leading up to this very important day? Where I was going to make my decision? What was going on? Here I was nervous but ready to hit the button and make a huuuuge decision and then nothing on the actual day, were all the signs were leading up to? My ego jumped to the opportunity saying, see it’s all a game and not real. How will you ever make this work? What if you can’t get any jobs/clients? No income. Nothing. Then what?

They came out and greeted us on tiny little kayaks. They were smiling and welcoming. There was only room for two people in each kayak. Backpackers first! I think there was about six of us. Plus the crew. And when we were all safe on the beach they went to get our backpacks. The sea was a bit calmer in the bay. So blue. So inviting. So Fijian. We were all taking to a large house or more like a wooden shack, right on the beach. There were about 20 handmade wooden beds, all in one room. On each pillow was a flower. There were no shops, no restaurants, no souvenir shop. It was an all inclusive hostel. It kind of had to be.

Time for lunch, I said to my husband. At least I could then focus on that and feeding the girls rather than dealing with the turmoil that was going on inside me. As I cut through the tomato (home grown by the way 🙂 ), I sat back and felt the butterflies in my stomach. No sign you say, ego? Will you look at that then? Angel wings or a heart – or both? Either way I knew I had found my answer and that I was going to make the right decision later that day. I ran inside (yes the weather was still nice and warm for us to sit outside and eat) to get my phone. I obviously couldn’t carry on eating, before I had taken a picture of what seems to be my final sign. As I picked up my phone, the time was 11 minutes past the hour! I think another butterfly joined the bunch inside my stomach.

I pushed the button, meaning no more unemployed benefits. I raised my arms up – I am free! Let a new adventure begin 🙂

Waking up this morning I felt so tired, although I had slept the whole night. I felt tired, yet calm. What am I to do today then? You are not to do much, you have to relax. Good ideas don’t come when you stress and try to force a plan. Yesterday was a milestone in your life, and today it’s time to relax and do what you love the most, write, the intuition softly whispered.

Well I did do something, other than writing this. I registered my own business and am now awaiting approval from the authorities. And one more thing. I registered myself as no longer being looking for new opportunities. I am now the captain of my own ship business.

We ended up staying on the tiny Fijian island for about 48 hours, before it was safe to travel on. Doing next to nothing (as there was nothing there). Eating, sleeping and lying in a hammock under the palm trees. Unfortunately the water wasn’t suitable for swimming in, due to the rough weather. The storm calmed down and the sea became clear, even more blue and inviting.

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