The horse and the battlefield – day 4

I looked around. It looked like a scene from the Braveheart film. As far as the eye could see injured and dead people. It was indeed a bloodbath. I was the last one standing. I held my sword high in my hand and roared. I felt strong and victorious.

I sat down on the bed. I could see myself in the mirror hanging on the wall. The light from a small lamp split my face into one dark and one visible half. What was going on? Earlier, whilst putting the 2 year old to bed, I had seen the view from a horse as I closed my eyes, whilst stroking her hair. You know the view you can only see, when you actual sit on a horse. The view between the horse’s ears. And now this battlefield “film” – what was going on? I felt more confused than ever. And a bit sad and a bit like I’m-giving-up-on-all-of-this-very-shortly (I guess I felt a bit like this crisp I ate a few days ago. I knew the picture would come in handy šŸ™‚ ) Why am I “seeing” this? What does it mean? Please explain…

As long as you keep seeing THIS as a battlefield (meaning my ability to SEE in a clairvoyant way) you will not get anywhere. You need to come to terms with it and accept it. Accept that it’s part of who you are, the intuition said. You need to let go and stop fighting it. OK, I understand, I think, and by the way wasn’t this suppose to be about Law of attraction? And then it hit me. How was I suppose to stay-and-keep-happy-and-then-attract-what-I-want if I still haven’t given completely in – if I still find myself doubting and battling all of this on and off?

And the horse? I have not been on a horse since I went on a horse back riding day trip in Australia about 18 years ago. What does that metaphor mean? It means that even if you at times think that you can’t control your thoughts and inputs, you CAN decide and be in control with how fast you want things to happen. Like a good horse rider will control the speed. If you hold back, the horse will too.

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